There is no doubt that having breast cancer makes me question what’s important. I’ve always lived life to the fullest, perhaps because both of my parents died young (biological father- 23 and mother- 54). Perhaps it’s just my personality. Having cancer takes my focus a step further however. It is probably a phase I’m going through but I have little interest in the usual life pleasures right now. I’m finding it more important to connect with people. You should see my diary!
Are split ends important? A broken finger nail? Work? Home decorations? Shopping? Well no. I’m sure it’s a temporary state of mind. In saying that, I have to say yes… losing my hair does mean something. Call me vain but I’m not sure that it’s all about vanity.
It’s very confronting to go to a wig shop and try on wigs (which made me look like a supermodel I have to say LOL). It’s even worse to have your hair tucked away and a ‘chemo hat’ planted on your head. I didn’t look like me. I looked like a cancer patient. I know hair isn’t everything it’s just on the outside but it confronted me with my illness in a very powerful way. It’s just as well the lovely lady in the shop was prattling away in my ear and distracting me from the sight.
This week I had my hair chopped to shoulder length. Perhaps I’ll get 1cm cut every day for the next 3 weeks! In the meantime, I’m designing my own hats so watch this space. I’ve never been a hat person (they don’t stay on my head) so that will be a new fashion statement. Sophie and I went looking at hats (and other stuff) last night. I didn’t buy any but tried on a few… You like?